Amazon Queen

Music: "Dancing Queen" by ABBA
Xena Song Parody by LaLa Watts (

Ephiny, Eponin, and Solari harmonize:

Oooo! She can talk, she can fight
Traveling at Xena's side
Oooo! Watch the bard make a scene
She's our Amazon Queen

Gabrielle sings:

Poteidaia moved much too slow
So I decided to hit the road
Follow a certain warrior
All over Greece, we're gonna fight for peace

Bilious green bra, staff, and skirt
"Roc" hard abs take a lot of work
I love to tell my stories
'Bout the hottest warrior, in the buttkickin' biz
Xena's sexy when pissed

Eponin, Ephiny, and Solari harmonize:

Gab is our Amazon Queen
Gentle and sweet, she's never mean
Amazon Queen
Gets seasick, eats squid, and turns green--oh yeah!

She's not just a sidekick
Bashing baddies with her stick
Oooo! Don't use her scrolls or dent her pan
Payback's a bitch, oh man!

(musical interlude while the Amazons dance/fight amongst themselves
Gabrielle and Xena share a smouldering look)

Gabrielle sings:

I'm queen of the Amazons
Though I'm short and irritating blonde
Because I saved Terreis
I have right of caste
What am I gonna do?
Xena's less than enthused

Solari, Eponin, and Ephiny harmonize:

Cuz Gab's our Amazon Queen
Young and sweet, so tan and lean
Amazon Queen
Watch her eat, she licks the plate clean--oh yeah!

Gabrielle sings:

I can't dance, but I can talk
Why ride when I can walk?
Oooo! Xena likes what I do
If I could get her to...mmph!

Xena interjects (hand over Gabrielle's mouth):

That's enough Amazon Queen!

<--Back to the Xena Songs Page

D. Joan Leib
Last updated 3 January 2000